Hacker News Books

My favorite book in 2013 (http://codingfearlessly.com/year-2013). After reading it, I accepted my introversion and learned how to better use it, view it as a strength instead of weakness.

Some of the examples given in the book are from Susan's own experience of being in work meetings as a lawyer.

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain

https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...

The same can be said of Gladwell's books.

There's a bit of strawman stuff going on in the article.

It also explains the cons about these brand new "wide noise open offices" that companies are building today.

I have an evergreen recommendation that anyone who wants to understand want introvert, extravert, and ambivert really mean should read Quiet by Susan Cains.

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking http://www.thepowerofintroverts.com/about-the-book/

The first changed profoundly how I view myself, the second shows me how I can improve.

I highly recommend the book to anyone who thinks they're an introvert, manages introverts, or has introverted family members -- it helped me understand/be happy with many of my own personality traits that I'd overlooked or misunderstood. (And, after reading the book, I realize I'm an ambivert, not an introvert.)

[1] https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...

This book profoundly affected me because she convinced me that many of my mannerisms and preferences are completely normal, and even positive. She also confirmed a lot of my suspicions that open offices, group work and the like are not as beneficial as they may seem.

Her TED talk[0] hits most of the major points in her book. If you enjoyed that, her book is a must read.

[0] -- http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts....

Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance - Robert Pirsig:
Fantastic book that talks about philosophy in a new way and goes deeper into discovering what's "Quality" and what are the main 2 ways of interacting/reading the world around us.

Adam Smith, theory of moral sentiments: Just began the book under ryan holiday advice, but can't really say more about it.

Game of thrones, 1st volume, I suppose this book doesn't need any explanation :)

It was a paradigm shifting book for me, made me understand some people in my life in profoundly new ways, and helped me discover stuff about my own personality. It's particularly interesting to think about introversion / extroversion in terms of managing energy levels.

1: https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/...

It reminds me of the popular book "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking‎"

In that book, the author suggest that introverts fake extroversion in short bursts.

As an introvert myself, this is something I've done for a decade. It's tiring but pays off. Sometimes we introverts miss out on great opportunities because we don't stretch our comfort zone.

I think this article is good advice on small ways for introverts to put themselves out there and "fake extroversion".

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quiet:_The_Power_of_Introverts...

-my first introduction to stoicism.

2. Mastery by Robert Greene

-stories about the lives of luminaries such as Henry Ford, Michael Faraday, and Da Vinci on what it takes to be successful.

3. Total Recall: My Unbelievably True Life Story by Arnold Schwarzenegger

-for providing me a new mental framework on building discipline and confidence.

4. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain

-for giving me a paradigm shift on how to think about myself and others.

5. Seeking Wisdom From Darwin to Munger by Peter Bevelin

-a compendium of cognitive biases and mental models.

One common definition of extroversion vs introversion is that an introvert needs time alone to recharge, whereas an extrovert needs time around people to recharge.

I would suggest doing some reading on the topic to prevent undervaluing a large portion of the population. For example, see [2], or Susan Cain's "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" [3].

[0] http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/29/introvert-myths_n_3...

[1] http://psychcentral.com/library/shyness.htm

[2] http://www.bustle.com/articles/56526-7-things-all-introverts...

[3] http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...

- Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain - Helped me better understand myself and others, highly recommend

- The Inner Game of Tennis by W. Timothy Gallwey - Advice on mastering the mental part of doing anything, not just tennis

- The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo - actually maybe the most important book I've read in a while, helped me throw away a lot of stuff I didn't need

- Models by Mark Manson - very helpful and ethical advice on attracting women for people like me who never really quite figured it out

- A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy by William B. Irvine- discussion of a philosophy of life that seems like it would work well for modern living

The Power of Vulnerability by Brenè Brown and
Quiet by Susan Cain.

The first is not a real book since it's audio only, there is no written counterpart but it changed the way I see, connect, live in the world entirely. I _never_ found something along those lines.

While the second book, Quiet, although a little boring in some sides, made me accept my introversion (although I don't appear like an introvert).

If I had to pick only one then it would be the power of vulnerability, such a shame it hasn't a paper counterpart (you could read all brene brown books probably and get the same message, but that audio book is so great).

---

A very basic definition is that introverts have a preference for quiet, minimally stimulating environments.

This means that introverts tend to enjoy quiet concentration, listen more than talk and think before they speak. They tend think more and focus on quality over quantity in most things and tend to focus intently on a single project at a time (i.e. friendships and how they engage projects and hobbies at work/during free time).

Extroverts are energized by social situations and tend to be multi-taskers who think out loud and therefore need others' feedback to validate their ideas or nudge them in the right direction.

---

I highly recommend the book, especially if you think you're an introvert or have difficulty accepting yourself as one. It really helped me see that it was OK being introverted and that there were certain advantages that extroverts don't have

[0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5520342

Assassin's Quest by Robin Hobb [1]. Stock fantasy at its best.

Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C Clarke [2]. Been stuck at halfway for too long, it gets boring in places.

[0]: http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/d...

[1]: http://www.amazon.com/Assassins-Quest-Farseer-Trilogy-Book/d...

[2]: http://www.amazon.com/Rendezvous-Rama-Arthur-C-Clarke-ebook/...

The work is always going to be collaborative, that is a given and the purpose of teams, but the shift right now is that as data and tech becomes more prevalent, the old times when extroverts governed by mere non-technical skills is going to wane in importance, because everything could be automated and quantified, leading to less room for human BS to climb the corporate ladder.

As the article mentions which I totally agree, communication becomes more important as you move up the ladder. But here is the key: it is easier for a technical person to learn soft skills than for a nontechnical person to do the reverse.

That is why the combination of engineering + MBA is so dangerous. It is because introverts are not given/interested in the chance to rule, that we don't see it often. But for a future where tech is going to dominate almost every industry, a firm's survival is going to depend on introverts.

For those interested, I recommend reading the book "Quiet" by Susan Cain, it explains this pretty well.

It's a big change. It impacts far more than the company office. It affects what society views as valuable. It changes what society sees as success. It basically shoots off in an orthogonal direction from everything society has been structured around for the entire 20th century. I am reminded of things like the recent book 'Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking' and the documentary 'The Century of the Self.' It really is a sea change and social changes of that magnitude are messy, slow, and usually come with a good amount of strife. Substantial changes like these being tried by this company are stressful and induce anxiety most especially in anyone who has invested in or succeeded in the older model, so the psychological hurdles are high. But, substantial changes are necessary and since this is a novel situation, our best chance of finding the successful solutions are trying and evaluating substantial changes.

Bingo! Along with our society has been much more encouraging with the extrovert personalities vs the introverts.

I encourage everyone to read the book Quiet by Susan Cain.

0. Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition

1. The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable

2. Elon Musk: Tesla, SpaceX, and the Quest for a Fantastic Future

3. Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

4. Steve Jobs: The Exclusive Biography

5. What Got You Here Won't Get You There

6. The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings of Authenticity, Connection, and Courage

7. The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph

8. The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over

9. Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion

10. Pre-Suasion: Channeling Attention for Change

11. Thinking, Fast and Slow

12. Mindset: The New Psychology of Success

13. Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life

14. Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World

15. Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity

16. Sapiens

17. The Everything Store: Jeff Bezos and the Age of Amazon

18. If you like space: Endurance: A Year in Space, a Lifetime of Discovery

19. Shoe Dog: A Memoir by the Creator of Nike

20. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking

21. Long Walk to Freedom: The Autobiography of Nelson Mandela

22. The DevOps Handbook: How to Create World-Class Agility, Reliability, and Security in Technology Organizations

Please read this. First off, it will make you feel better about yourself and realise that there are many people like you. It also addresses the "Asian introvert living in outspoken America" cultural issue.

To meet people, you need to change your environment. Put yourself in situations where you are forced to interact. Groups or meetups are a great place to get started. It depends on your interests but something active like a sport or dancing will generally help you form better bonds.

Will it happen right away? No, but keep going on a weekly basis and become a regular. You'll find that friendships will happen.

To initiate friendships from these situations, you need to move the relationship to another setting. If you only see the person at the meetup, it's more of an acquaintance.

If you get along with someone you can say something like "Hey, I'm thinking of seeing that new movie this weekend. You want to come along?"

The envy you feel when you see groups is a good thing. It means you want to move in that direction.

"""Please read "Quiet - The power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking" by Susan Cain

Saying its a habit is saying that you can easily overcome it. I don't feel it's a choice, do you know how many times I thought about ending my life because I hated being born an introvert and shy?

This article might as well be called: If you are shy, its you're fault, stop being lazy and change.

Once gays are accepted the biggest issue is probably going to be that introverts dont feel accepted in this extravert world."""

The conflation of terms like shyness and introversion (etc) has been discussed before, so I'll leave that one alone. The last two sentences of the comment are more interesting. If you are shy, is that necessarily bad? And is it your "fault"?

The other issue applies as well. It's not OK to fire someone because of their gender, race, sexual orientation, religion, etc; but firing someone because they are "shy" or "introverted" or "not a people person" seems to be perfectly acceptable and legal. Shouldn't that be considered discrimination as well? (Assuming that "being good with people" isn't a requirement of the job.)

Bad Blood (John Carreyrou) - Story of Theranos, its founders and the conception of terrible ideas. Great record of their actions based on subjective ethics and morals, how they can lead you to going insane.

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking (Susan Cain) - Fun read for functional introverts like myself.

Stuff Matters (Mark Miodownik) - I wish every science lesson is taught like this

Em and the Big Hoon (Naresh Fernandes) - Fiction, but based closely on the author's mother, her control over the English language, poetry and the mental illness' control over her and their family here in Bombay.

Born a Crime (Trevor Noah) - A biography of the Daily Show host. He's seen a lot of terrible situations and come out unscathed!

Being Mortal (Atul Gawande) - Hospice care - all its good and bad.

A Man Called Ove - Fictional and funny book about a man with a strict code, who lost his beloved wife and still dislikes everyone.

It's one of those books that's full of anecdotes and padding out though, so if you want a summary the author's also made blog posts and a TED talk that summarize the subject well enough.

There's a book about this called Quiet, I it. It's an overview of the like social history of the concepts of intro- and extroversion, and also research about these traits. The difference seems to be more about stimulation and arousal than like social preferences or anything to do with work.

Introverts get more aroused from the same stimulus than extroverts do. This manifests in a bunch of different ways. The social ones are most obvious because human connection is the most common source of intense stimulus in human lives.

But for example extroverts are more likely to be "adrenaline junkies" because they need more stimulus to feel the same degree of excitement. This has nothing to do at all with social stuff or talking or "getting things done" it's just a thing. There are dozens or hundreds of correlations like this.

The interpersonal and social differences are the most obvious effects, but they aren't at the core of what these things are.

Take anything anyone claims to tells you about yourself with a grain of salt, of course, but I found it interesting.

An excellent book on Introverts is Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain

http://amzn.to/1Fxitw2 (affiliate link)

The three reasons stated for the inefficiency of brainstorming are:

(1) Production blocking
(Only one person can talk at a time while others listen. Think of a single entry queue.)

(2) Evaluation apprehension
(Some (or most) people hesitate in presenting their idea because it might be critiqued or ridiculed.)

(3) Social Loafing
(There are times when members of a group will slack-off because they know other members will take over the work.)

A few years ago I decide to try out the whole digital nomad lifestyle thing. I was able to see lots of interesting places, but what I didn't account for was how much of an introvert I am. Most of the celebrity nomad travelers seem to be pretty outgoing and I couldn't figure out where they were finding all of these people they met.

Part of it might have been my strange preference for colder climates, but I spent an entire month in Vilnius Lithuania without talking to hardly anyone. The language barrier probably didn't help either. My time was spent riding the bus, wandering the city, and working in coffee shops.

I've read accounts of other people who had experiences like this and how much they hated it, and while it was sometimes lonely, I do think I learned quite a bit about myself from the experience. Spending so much time alone meant a lot of time to think and reflect, and I think I was able to figure out some things about myself and work on bad habits that people who have lots of other people in their lives might not get a chance to or might not think about.

Some people just need more or less human interaction than others. There is a really good book called Quiet by Susan Cain that is a defense of introversion that was really helpful for me.

I'll choose Daniel Kahneman - Thinking, Fast and Slow (http://www.amazon.com/Thinking-Fast-Slow-Daniel-Kahneman-ebo...).

The way it changed my life was to make me actually think more about the way my mind operates, the decisions I make and the way these decisions affect my life. As a consequence, there were a few books I read later that were loosely related to this one in the way that they all refer to the way people think.

Barry Schwartz - The Paradox of Choice

Steven Pinker - How the Mind Works

Nassim Taleb - The Black Swan; and Fooled by Randomness

Leonard Mlodinov - The Drunkard's Walk (quite similar to Fooled by Randomness)

Carol Dweck - Mindset: The New Psychology of Success

Neil Postman / Andrew Postman - Amusing Ourselves to Death

Rolf Dobelli - The Art of Thinking Clearly (just started)

On my reading list now:

Quiet by Susan Cain - mentioned already

The Better Angels of Our Nature - Steven Pinker

Jared Diamond - Guns, Germs and Steel

Neal Stephenson - Snow Crash

Jared Diamond - The World Until Yesterday

Also, did not quite change my life, but very recommended:

Neal Stephenson - Anathem.

You may have to struggle through the beginning, but as soon as I understood the way the world he devised operates, I was thrilled completely.